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September 2008

Change Your Outlook and Your Luck Will Change

Six Ways to Maximize Your Fun

1. Approach dating as not just looking for an important relationship, but as enjoying life.

2. View dating as a chance to increase your circle of friends.

3. Find innovative and unusual places to meet people. Join a club, volunteer or take up a sport.

4. Take one positive aspect away from each date. For example, “I liked his values, her sense of style or his humor.” Pick a quality or characteristic that you would like in your future mate. This benefits you, even if you aren’t attracted to that person.

5. Become the person you’d like to date. Use your experiences as an opportunity for personal growth.

6. Embrace your singledom. You have the freedom to do anything you want, meet everyone you want and learn everything you can about yourself.

The point is to keep dating light and casual, especially early on. On a first date, go out to lunch, drinks or brunch and split the check. This keeps the expectations and pressure lower. If you decide to see each other again, you know your date is interested in you. It’s that simple.

As you get to know each new person, you’ll have an opportunity to “try each other out” and see if the relationship might work. Pay attention to what you’re discovering. As you progress on your dating journey, you’ll be exposed to new types of people and new ideas. Even if a date doesn’t

develop into a full-blown relationship, you’re still growing and learning as a human being, which makes life interesting and exciting.


Dating Trends Survey...

In a survey by It’s Just Lunch of 38,912 singles, IJL found that:

·         1 in 8: the chance a woman has of a 2nd date if she has not heard from him within 24 hours of their first date.

·         Top conversation killers: past relationships—49%, dieting or body image—21%, politics—15% and marriage—15%.

·         17%--the chance of liking a date set up by a friend.

·         88% of women find money to be very important in a relationship.

·         Topic to ignore on a first date—60% of women and 64% of men don’t talk politics on a first date.

·         52% of singles feel they are too busy to meet other singles.

·         76% of women date men that are at least 5 years older than them, while 80% of men date women that are at least 5 years younger than them.

·         53% of singles find a great smile the most attractive feature.

·         43% of singles have Googled someone on the internet before a first date.


5 Things to Say When You're Interested/Not Interested

Five Things to Say If You Want to See Them Again

1. “I had a great time. Would you like to get together again soon?”

2. “Would you be interested in dinner next time?”

3. “This was a great lunch! I’d like to get to know you better.”

4. “I’m going hiking on Saturday and would love for you to join me.”

5. “Now that the hard part is out of the way, are you interested in going out again?”

Five Things to Say When You’re Not Interested

1. “The best of luck and fun in your future dates. Thanks again.”

2. “I can see us becoming friends. I’d like to invite you to my next party.”

3. “I had a good time, but I just don’t think we have that much in common.” (Very politely

point out the differences between your lifestyles, interests, etc., which will show why you’re not a good match.)

4. “I have a friend you might like, can I give him/her your number?”

5. “I feel that the chemistry just isn’t quite right between us.” (This implies it’s a mutual thing.)