It's Just Lunch :: The Dating Tips Blog

Dating Myths Survey

The new It's Just Lunch survey is now available!  Weigh in and let us know what you think about common dating myths.

Political Crossroads

Many relationships, especially new dating relationships don't find themselves aligned on the same road trip. So is this an opportunity to explore a dynamic adventure and enjoy for the long-term? Or just a week-end getaway towards an inevitable break-down.

This question was in the forefront of our minds when we created our latest It's Just Lunch® survey (which is causing quite a stir out there in red and blue states alike). 

56% of men believed that dating someone who has opposite political opinions might not make for a good long-term relationship, but it could create some fantastic passion.

56% of women disagreed. The survey revealed that women wanted to explore the differences and understand how men came to align with certain political opinions. Men on the other-hand, found the differences a green light to pursue a dating relationship-but were not interested in why women held a particular political stance. 

So where does this leave the future dating state of political opposites? Stay tuned. 

To read more of the yahoo article on our dating survey, click here. 

Keeping Your Political Cool With A Partner Of The Opposite Party

These are screaming times. No matter what time of day or night you turn on the TV, there is some variety of partisan bickering smothering every topic. Watch, not even the weather is going to be safe from political fallout in a couple of weeks. Luckily though, the deafening electoral process will have subsided into a manageable din that can be ignored for another four years. But, what if your partner comes from the opposite side of the political fence? The debate continues no matter who wins the presidency this year... 

We at It’s Just Lunch® wanted to know if generally folks AVOID dating someone with different political views for that very reason. Our recent dating survey showed some interesting results:

60% of men and 68% of women said that they definitely date people who have similar political opinions and beliefs.

Just over 39% of men and almost 32% of women said that they throw caution to the wind and definitely DO DATE people with DIFFERENT political ideals. 

For you brave daters in the 30%-we have some wise advice to make it through election day and beyond, from psychologytoday.com. These are the 8 types of (mis)communications that can make a political discussion push a relationship off a cliff. 

 1. Sarcasm.

2.  Blocked listening

3.  A fixed belief system

4.  Unwillingness to engage (“Let’s not talk politics”) or to allow the other side to speak.

5.  Distortion of what the other side says.

6.  Speaking for the other (“He just think that…”).  

7.  Bad-mouthing opposing perspectives.

8. Escalated emotional intensity.

If you are going to talk about your differences, Dr. Susan Heitler’s advice is;

“If you are going to engage in a political discussion, remind yourself early and often to stay cool. Keep your ears open so that you can listen for what makes sense in what others say.  Treat what others say respectfully, listening in the best possible light to their differing perspective.”* 

*To read the full article from psychologytoday, click here. 

How Do I Get A Date?

We can get a fabulous dinner easily enough...thank you Open Table®. We can pick out the perfect car and get a great deal...thank you promotion at work. We even can get new living room furniture WITHOUT leaving the living room.

So, in this day and age of convenience and in a time in our lives when things are running just fine, why is it so hard to get a date?

The problem certainly isn’t that there AREN’T any potentials out there. We see plenty of attractive, well-dressed, successful looking individuals out there. So why don’t we get to meet them? The folks that we really want to meet that is, not the guy who still lives at home with his mom, or your friend’s trainer from the gym who is “really hot”. 

Now, more than ever it can be more difficult for successful people, particularly successful women, to find dates who measure up to their expectations. 

So how do we solve this dilemma? Well, at It’s Just Lunch®, we’ve known how important it is to match our successful clients with quality individuals for more than 20 years. The secret of our success lies in knowing that creating lasting relationships is based on a date with someone who you really want to date again. So, let us set you up on a great date. All you have to do is just show up and enjoy. Mission accomplished. 

Dating in the Deep End

In high school and college it was basically decided for us. You didn’t venture outside your class much, and if you did, you had external motivations like “prom” that got you into a year or two out of your age range. Fast forward to graduation caps flying, careers beginning, and the sudden deepening of the dating pool that you were wading around in for the past 20 something years... 

Suddenly, it’s all adult swim, and we’re backstroking around without too much awareness of age-Or are we? Are the perceptions of dating someone older (or younger) rooted in our own gender restrictions that we place upon ourselves? Or are we just following the unmentioned rules of the dating pool?

 It’s Just Lunch® was fascinated by this topic, so we did a survey (of course) a couple months back. What we found was that the idea that men prefer to date younger women, and women prefer to date older men, is still alive and well.

Only 8.7% of both men and women said that this age-old rule is the only way to go; with 44.6% saying that people may date a range of ages, but they’ll end up following the crowd.

35.7% of singles went out on a limb and said that age “appropriateness” plays a role in whom they chose to date, but in the end, they would be open to dating someone outside their age range. 

Only 11% threw out the rules entirely and said “Who Cares!...Age is just a number.”

So what does all this mean? That the rules are totally up to you! Have fun in the pool, at whichever end you chose to swim.