With so many methods of communication these days, it can be tough to know how you should contact someone once you’re interested in them. It can be easier to text, email, tweet, or write on their Facebook wall, but are there times when you really should pick up the phone and call?
In a survey conducted by It’s Just Lunch of over 26,000 singles on how technology impacts relationships, 65 percent of respondents said they were more likely to text than call after swapping phone numbers with someone to whom they’re attracted. Nearly half of them indicated they interacted with their love interest on social media either daily or weekly.
Let’s face it: typing is easier than talking for most people, especially when nerves and feelings are involved. Just because it’s the easy thing to do though doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to do.
Here are four instances to watch out for when it comes to your means of communication:
Plan dates over the phone
There’s a time and a place for texts, emails and social media, but it’s not when planning dates early in your relationship.
“Ultimately, relationships are built on communication,” said Julie Lopez, head of matchmaking at It’s Just Lunch. “The best way to develop a healthy line of communication is to start from day one.”
Want to shoot the other person a quick message to tell them you had a great time on your date? Feel free to pull out your phone and fire off a short text or email.
Never drink and text
This one isn’t just a no-no for texting and other forms of messaging, it applies to phone calls as well. Rarely will anything good come from a drunk message. It’s entirely likely you’ll come off as immature if it’s obvious you’re drinking. It’s not outside the realm of possibility you might sound like a jerk. Plus, if you send one drunk message, you’ll probably send ten. Now you’re annoying.
Not to mention liquid courage tends to make people say things they might not otherwise be ready to say, which leads us to our next inappropriate situation for typing . . . .
Feelings should be verbalized
When you need to express a feeling for the first time - whether that’s affection, love, disappointment or anger - it shouldn’t be through a device. It all goes back to developing communication as the bedrock of your relationship. If you can’t express your feelings to their face now, you may continue struggling to express those feelings throughout your relationship.
Of course, if you’re already saying “I love you” in person, feel free to text, tweet, email or shout it from the rooftops. Just don’t let that first time the other person knows your true feelings be on a telephone screen.
No fighting and typing
Don’t be a coward. If you’re upset, speak with the other person (preferably in person). Without tone or body language, it’s easy for both sides to misinterpret the issue.
Ultimately, the biggest danger in using technology to communicate for any of these reasons is the potential for misinterpretation and misunderstanding. One of the top reasons - if not the top reason - relationships fail is because of a lack of communication. Interacting via text, email and social media is fine for a quick, light-hearted message but should never be your primary means of communicating.
Are you still looking for your match? Let the matchmakers at It's Just Lunch help you. Get started today by calling us at 1-800-489-7897 or click here to tell us a little about yourself.